13 reasons why the Pacers have the best start to the ’22-23 season…in spirit

The Indiana Pacers are currently 1-3, tied for the second-worst record in the Eastern Conference. But for the pessimists, that is just the tip of the iceberg. Myles Turner is injured, Buddy Hield has been overstaying his projected stay in the state of Indianapolis (copy for Myles), Chris Duarte has been laying eggs left and right to kick the season off, and for Pacers fans, even catching a glimpse of the games remains a toss-up.

Despite all those, however, make no mistake: the Indiana Pacers are having the best start to the 2022-23 season, albeit in spirit. Here’s why.

The Indiana Pacers have the best start to the 2022-23 NBA season…in spirit

To better emphasize the Pacers’ somehow perfect start to the season, let’s pamper the words a tad and turn everything into a comprehensive list to send my point across.

Syntactic murmurs aside, here are the reasons why the pessimistic Pacers fans should back off for once and let the optimistic ones have a soiree of biased, yet factual takes in their heads to justify the clearly objective headline of this piece.

1. Tyrese Haliburton is a point-and-assist, double-double machine. His 9.8 dimes per contest are only currently tied for third in the league, but hey, he’s playing the least amount of minutes among the top 11 in the category. Give him the assists crown!
2. Bennedict Mathurin is looking like an actual first-overall pick who made a pact with a transcendental being to make him seem like he’s not so he can fall to the Pacers at sixth. Now, that’s loyalty.
3. Bennedict Mathurin has been better than LeBron. In fact, he has more wins than the King.
4.  Jalen Smith looks like the best bargain in the association, averaging a near-double-double in just 20.5 minutes per game.
5. Andrew Nembhard is legit and appears to be a sleeker Jose Alvarado. Somehow, he also appears to be more TJ McConnell than TJ McConnell.
6. The slow reanimation of Goga Bitadze after most fans have started to stop hoping that the Pacers’ questionable choice in the 2019 NBA Draft obtains ample sense is quite the fascinating ride.
7. I stand on this hill: Isaiah Jackson is still the best pure shot blocker in the NBA.
8. Among their tanking classmates, only the Magic have registered more losses.
9. The Utah Jazz, expected flunkers, are surprisingly good. They may even be better than last season’s team after acquiring, perhaps unintentionally, an All-Star contender in Lauri Markkanen.
10. The San Antonio Spurs, expected flunkers, are somehow looking like the Spurs of yesteryears. Even Gregg Popovich’s explicit pokes at the team’s lack of talent have not been enough to deter unprecedented wins.
11. The Los Angeles Lakers absolutely suck, but they will not be in the Wemby sweepstakes.
12. To save themselves, the Lakers need the Pacers. A golden fleece via two unprotected first-round picks may be in the works.
13. In the aftermath of the Pacers-Kings trade last season, Sacramento is looking more and more foolish, while Indiana is looking smarter by the day (and with every Haliburton highlight).

Got any more?