Gerald Green Is a Chupacabra Sasquatch Sea Monster

Gerald Green is a Chupacabra Sasquatch Sea Monster. As in, I don’t believe he exists. Nothing can jump like this. I think he’s Photoshopped.

The strangest thing about his ability to rise is that it seems to be improving. He’s like the Benjamin Button of hops. I mean, he could absolutely sky in his Boston days and he did blow out that birthday candle, but it wasn’t until he started doing stuff like this in New Jersey that he became the undisputed best leaper in the NBA. And now? It just seems to be getting sillier and sillier by the day.

Seriously, who jumps higher when they’re 26 than they did when they were 22?

Tags: Highlights

  • Philip Tarrant

    He barely got up on that. His chin wasn’t even above the rim.

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  • Knut Holt

    Chpacabras are probably mutant individuals from known species that stroll along as lone individuals, that in spite of the mutations are very capable in every means. But since the mutant individuals are from different species, the desriptions vary very much. This man is probably a human chupacabra version.