Gerald Green Is a Chupacabra Sasquatch Sea Monster


Gerald Green is a Chupacabra Sasquatch Sea Monster. As in, I don’t believe he exists. Nothing can jump like this. I think he’s Photoshopped.

The strangest thing about his ability to rise is that it seems to be improving. He’s like the Benjamin Button of hops. I mean, he could absolutely sky in his Boston days and he did blow out that birthday candle, but it wasn’t until he started doing stuff like this in New Jersey that he became the undisputed best leaper in the NBA. And now? It just seems to be getting sillier and sillier by the day.

Seriously, who jumps higher when they’re 26 than they did when they were 22?

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